Monday, May 11, 2009

No Clue Where This is Coming From!

Yikes! The last three posts all filled to the brim with death. We all know Death as a part of the cyclical pattern that is life on Earth and in the Universe. It is inescapable, undeniable and frightening to many. Sadness tugs at the heartstrings and depression looms, watching with one eye as it peeks round the corner waiting and wondering if it can claim fresh company. I am a wallower. Ofttimes I've had difficulty moving on; wondering if one morning I'll wake to see Gilbert by the kitchen door, a letter in the mail from Great-Grandmother or a message on my phone from a long-departed cousin. Wallowing, as 50's Gal has pointed out recently, is not healthy. Moving on may seem cold sometimes, but dwelling on sadness and loss only make you miss out on the life that is happening now. The week of rain that persisted following the euthanization of darling Gilbert was an apropos mourning time and I have "moved on" with my life. I remember him, and I always will. Some cultures believe that perpetual mourning over the loss of any loved ones, be they human or otherwise, prevents said loved ones from moving on with their journeys. I am letting Gilbert go.
As for my forward journey, I have not practised much, of late. The Sun allowed me reveling time this past weekend (my days off) and today (on the farm.) I adore rain and the fury it can be, but I was ready for a break after the week of gloom! A little (or a lot) of thunder and lightening would have broken the monotony of the constant grey and intermittent beats of drops on my head, roof and windows. The plants enjoyed it all thoroughly, however, and the farm is in full bloom with lovely flowers and yummy things to eat. Auntie's garden is thankful, too, and so are we for the break in the utility bill for not having to water the aforementioned garden. Still no garden planned by me, though.
Speak of canning, preserving, pickling and root cellars this morning at the breakfast table tickled my fancy and Auntie and I will be reviewing which recipes we'll need to take advantage of and which veggies we'll need to add to the garden for a sated and healthy winter. Self-sustenance always excites me! Until that is possible here, though, I've decided to switch to my local businesses. Among other switches, my local grocer will benefit instead of the Stop&Shop to which I could walk. I hope to eventually be able to bike to the local guy (as he is more than a short walk away) , but convenience will be taking a back seat to community from now on. I'm expecting to save money, too, for all of the impulse items I waste my hard earned cash will stay tucked into their environmentally unfriendly, cardboard or plastic displays, garishly decorated until some other schlub falls for their plumage. Not me! I'm done with that. Auntie and I will be growing our own food (which, as I had stated before, she has already begun), baking our own bread and supporting our local community. Why not?! People did it well into the late 1950's! Why not get to know the local grocer/butcher (though I will not be meeting the butcher as I am a vegetarian)/baker/farmer? We even look at our neighbors funny, as if they shouldn't be there. They've got as much a right to happiness and closeness of community as we have! Let's share! Let's resurrect the barn dances, the talks over the fence, the sharing our recipes over coffee or tea! Let's have a summer block party with bonfires and ghost stories and fun for every age!
What am I talking about? A fire has been lit in my vicinity. Here is who lit that fire. She is a must read! I'm not just talking about living life as if you are a housewife in 1955 (as 50's Gal, there), but that we are missing the primal togetherness of community we all, as humans, once had and lost along the way somehow. Forget about race, sex, creed, orientation, etc and look at each other and love one another for the pure reason that we are human beings and we need each other. Each and every one of us needs every other person. Yes, even the people that really grate on your nerves. Without them, we wouldn't learn all of the lessons we thought we were teaching ourselves all these years. I'm not saying you have to keep the poisonous people you know in your life or even bring them back. Just try to acknowledge them in your mind and life and take away the lessons your were meant to learn, or even those you weren't meant to learn, but did instead. Releasing the anger you feel/felt for the poisonous people is better for you in the long run. (I hold my anger in my lower back. *U_U*) Forgive, but don't forget. That is a lesson! Don't carry it with you. Understanding is key in this life. Once you let go of preconceived notions, fears, hatred and doubt, the Universe opens up to you; gives you what you want and need. We don't need what the government, advertising, lawyers or anyone else richer than us says that we need. We need each other to survive and be happy. Embrace that, and be happy.

2 comments:

  1. It IS nice to have a little community of friends, but don't forget we all need our alone time, too. It helps us to know who we are and what is important to US. We don't all don't necessarily need the same things as the person next to us, but I do agree that we should all do our part to make the world a better place in whatever way we can. That includes, for me, my little gardens, shopping locally when I can (my kingdom for a proper farmer's market!!), and saying hello to my neighbors whenever I see them.
    It is nice to hear you are letting go, but also that you allowed yourself to grieve. BOTH are important.

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  2. I know all about "me time!" It's the basis of my sanity. I'm finding, though that more and more waves to neighbors, nods to strangers and smiles to everyone is opening the world to me before I spread my wings to travel and be in that world someday. As for grieving and moving on, all emotion is worth expressing and experiencing, but not healthy to dwell upon. *^_^*

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