Sunday, November 15, 2015

Spam, Time and Again

Once again I turn to my attention to the blogosphere. Once again thanks is due to spam comments. Once again I am compelled to update those loyal few who still keep me around.
School continues. I am currently nearing the end of my umpteenth 2-course semester. This time, I am studying General Psychology (online) and Intro to Theater (on campus.) This past summer (it seems so long ago, now), I was offered the role of Helena in A Midsummer Night's Dream with a local theater group. They welcomed me with open arms, and I loved every minute of it! This re-entry into theater shook my dramatic dragon, and gave me the impetus to potentially pursue acting, after all. However, that little dragon lost his fire, and promptly curled back up atop his hoard and drifted off to dreamland once more. He may awaken again someday, but, for now, I am turning my attention back to Zoology.
I have made a couple more puppets, with others planning themselves out in my mind. My new man inspires me to be who I am, but to aspire to great things. Little by little, I am moving ever forward. Never more backward.
But tell me, dear friends, what inspires you? What ignites your fire? What fans your flames?

Monday, February 9, 2015

Reminiscing and the Internet's Valentine Woes

This time every year, society explodes into a war between three parties: those who love Valentine's Day, those who loathe it, and those who complain about others' complaints that the day is/isn't necessary. I tend to bounce back and forth, if I'm being honest.
A spam comment brought me here, today. Surprisingly, it was not the V-Day argument. That spam comment was neatly placed on a post from February 2010 titled "Being Single." In bullet-point form, I had listed some of my favorite things about singlehood. Then, I went on to read the comments. The last was a response to Bridget, which stated that the length of my planned reply was far better used as a follow-up post for the first week of March that year. So, being the narcissist that I am, I went on and read that post and its comments. (Some people like to hear themselves speak. I like to look at my reflection and read my writings. I fully admit it.)
And, here I am, sitting at my computer, early-February. Still single. Still experiencing twinges of that all-too-familiar loneliness. However, present Renee is quite different from 2010 Renee. I suppose 5 years changes a person. Well, changes occur to those who are willing. I was willing. Still am. So, you know, that hasn't changed. Change is constant. Why fight it? I digress.
Since that post, I have asked guys out, been set up, been flattered by strangers online. (Bots? Maybe? Who cares?! They're flattering me!) But I have learned so much more about myself through those encounters. My life has changed by leaps and bounds. I was artistically inspired, physically motivated, academically aroused. I saw others that I liked going places that I wanted to be, and their muses became mine.
Outwardly, my life looks so similar to what it was two years ago. Inwardly, new gears have been maintained and oiled and have begun grinding into movement. Some new plans have been set into motion, and I am apprehensive, yet excited to see where these next steps will take me.
Change is constant. Being single has been a part of my identity for the past few years. While it may not always be constant, I cannot rule out that possibility. While I am still single, I am still OK with the position. So, let me just say this: Do what you feel on St. Valentine's Day. Love it. Loathe it. Revel in it. Ignore it. Wallow in your loneliness (whether you're in a relationship or not.) In the end, it's just another day to embrace yourself, change, and the changes within.

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